What animal do you transform into? I have no idea how this quiz is so accurate, I thought my secret was safe. I never even told my mom. All my life I have lived a normal human life by day, but turned into my secret animal alter-ego during the nighttime, when I run around and terrorize small carrots and maybe a strawberry or two. They hear me coming and they tremble with fear, for they know the fury my two teeth will wreak upon their tender flesh.
My size does not do justice to the massive rage I carry within, rage that I try to work through on my wheel. Tirelessly I run, tirelessly I try to destroy the hunger that drives me. Alas, it goes too deep, a seemingly endless pit of destruction that not even chewing a toilet paper cardboard insert roll thingy will quench. I chew through them like they are paper, because they are, dammit. Still, my rage burns. I run through my tiny tunnels, bury myself in sawdust, yet my anger does not subside.
One day, all the world will see the full glory of my power, and they will bow before me in terror at my hidden might. But until that day, I will be only what I am. I will be a tiny ball of fur with a congenitally absent tail. I will have two sharp teeth that never stop growing, and cuteness so profound I will make you cry with a single look. For I am hamster, and you shall hear me squeak.
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